Some perspective

Jules and I have been quite worried about the car, to the point of planning to send Christmas cards out this year just so that we can strike a certain 4×4 workshop off our list. As we don’t have the beast to do cool things to, we’re stuck doing boring admin. The list seems to go on forever – carnets, insurance, international driving licenses, closing bank accounts, procrastinating etc etc etc.

While catching up on various websites earlier Jules came across this blog and suddenly our problems don’t seem so bad.  I don’t know how much time you need before you can “look at it one day and laugh”, but I imagine a while.  His photographs are mind-boggling, so definitely worth having a look around his site.

The car saga continues…

The car was supposedly going to be ready this weekend. Now there’s a diesel knock and this involves fuel injectors being sent off to be tested.

Another week with no car – I guess this is what if feels like when a parent waits for their children to come back from their first scout camp.

Things are starting to get a bit stressful as we still have quite a bit of stuff to do on the car and Jules still needs to learn how to drive it, having been chauffeured around for the past year like the queen on her way to a wedding. I’m also going back to South Africa in February for a friend’s wedding. Wesley I hope you realise that you’re getting a new piston for our car as a wedding gift!!!

On a positive note I’ve got 63 hours of work left for 2013.

The day the Beast became the Bastard

On our way down to Devon to stay with family for Christmas the Beast threw a tantrum 90 minutes into our journey. Smoke started belching out the exhaust, we lost power and a gut-wrenching grinding sound started emanating from the engine, leaving us stranded on the side of the highway for about 5 hours while we waited for a tow truck.

A piston needs to be replaced at a cost of over £2,000. The soul-destroying thing is this was its first “lengthy” journey since we got the car back from being serviced a month ago.

We had just spent an absolute fortune at a company that specialises in overland preparation, first getting them to service it to the point where it was reliable enough to handle a trans African trip, and once they had done this adding all the other gadgets.

I’m not going to mention their name just yet in case things turn around, but at the moment they refuse to accept any liability, saying it’s just really bad luck.

We’ve been told that the cause of the problem was a tiny piece of rubber that got into a pipe preventing oil from getting to the piston. Overheating etc ensued. Why it happened a month after this service and not before is clearly a mystery and just one of life’s little coincidences. Maybe I’m just being bitter, but ultimately we paid a fortune to get a reliable car and we got back a car that broke down within a month and I would expect them to fix it at their own expense. I would be interested to hear anybody’s thoughts on this.

They also seem to have lost the extension to the ladder for our roof top tent.

On a positive note, I can’t thank the RAC enough for their professionalism. These guys work their arses off over Christmas and I would especially like to thank Tony for all his help.

More about the Beast / Bastard to follow…

Maps and Compass

Electronic equipment has a habit of breaking or changing hands and for this reason we will also be taking paper maps and a compass with us.

We will be using Michelin maps 745 (North East) and 746 (Central and South). Although not as detailed as Tracks4Africa, they have comprehensive coverage of all major roads.

For the European leg of our journey and as a backup for Africa we have a Garmin Nuvi 2595, which came with maps for the whole of Western Europe. First impressions are that it is a really good product with loads of features ranging from Bluetooth with various apps such as weather when connecting to an android phone to voice commands that can even understand our lekker kiff Sarf Efrikkin eccents.

Kelly Kettle

Warning – this is a post about a kettle.

When a normal kettle is a only a couple of quid, the expense of a Kelly Kettle seems hard to justify until you take the cost of fuel into account.  Boiling water daily in a normal kettle will use up loads of gas, and considering we might not be able to get refills in some countries, this could be a bit of an issue.

The Kelly Kettle uses naturally occurring solid fuels, so after the initial investment, you never have to pay for fuel again.  It takes about 7 minutes to boil a full kettle (about 1.5 litres) and you don’t need much wood for this.  At night it’s easy to get carried away and use all the sticks you can find because flames shoot up the chimney and it looks like a jet engine.  We got the stainless steel version, and unless I do something stupid like reverse over it, we’ll probably have it forever.  We bought the cooking set as well, but unfortunately this is quite flimsy and had I known this when we got the kettle I wouldn’t have bothered with the pots.

The chimney part will get covered in soot and is a bugger to clean, but keeping it black will help it absorb the heat better making it more efficient (or at least that’s what I’ve told Jules because dishes are generally my job).

Modifications

A safe, reliable car can mean the difference between life and death on a trip like this.  For this reason we took it for a serious service, having pretty much everything stripped, checked and replaced where necessary.  Fortunately it was already in great condition (maybe it really was driven by a little old man who spent more time washing it than driving it), so we didn’t need anything major done.

As with most things we’ve got for the trip, decisions on what to get have generally been based on other people’s blogs and reviews we’ve found online.  We’ve tried not to go overboard, as our budget is limited, so where we can we’ve gone for 2nd hand stuff.  Without trying to be melodramatic, it’s sobering to think that on a trip like this a normal inconvenience like a flat car battery or tyre could lead to a life or death situation.  When it comes to things that could affect our safety we’ve gone for the best we can afford.


Modifications to the car include the following:

New shocks – We opted for Old Man Emu shocks to handle the extra weight we will be carrying.

Wheels – We replaced the alloy wheels that came with the car with steel ones, meaning that if a wheel is bent or damaged we can use an FBH (Very Big Hammer) to knock it back into shape.  We replaced the tyres with BFG All Terrains – they come highly recommended  as being extremely robust with tread to churn up elephant dung as if you’d popped it into a food processor.  We’ve opted for 2 spares, and suddenly you realise how expensive this business is – we’ve basically spent the same on wheels and tyres that flights, accommodation and a diving course in Egypt cost me several years ago.  We have a saying in my family for things like this – I theeeeenk I’m going to faaaaint!

Split charge system – We now have 2 batteries – a heavy duty one to start the car, and a 2nd one that allows us to run things like the fridge and camp lighting without worrying about draining the main battery.  Hopefully the second battery doesn’t go flat because without trying to sound melodramatic again, it is scary to think that a warm beer could turn into a sobering situation.

Snorkel – We aren’t planning on crossing raging rapids, but theoretically it makes a huge difference to to the air intake, reducing the amount of dust clogging up the air filter.  They also look so cool!

Packing space – We’ve had the middle and rear seats removed and installed a sturdy hexboard dog guard to separate the back and middle of the car.  Unfortunately this means that we can’t take any passengers.  Fortunately it also means that we can’t help people move house.  Water and the fridge will go in the middle and the rest of our stuff will go in the back, with as little as possible going on the roof.  We’ve installed a sturdy drawer system in the boot, which when open will also act as a table for our cooker for the one or two nights when we don’t have a braai.

Safe – we installed a safe for cash and passports.

Gearlock – The gearlock locks the car in neutral, and hopefully will prevent it from being stolen.

Other modifications include a steering guard, jacking points, recovery points and a bright LED light on the back to use at night when preparing food and looking for stuff.

Nanford Guest House

Our first aid course was in Oxford and we stayed in a charming B&B called Nanford Guest House.

We did a quick search online to find the address on our way there, and upon seeing some reviews for the first time we realised our fatal error – the Nanford guest house has been voted the dirtiest hotel in Britain.  Having stayed there I can say the review was quite kind, as you could probably extend the geographic region to include the rest of Europe.  It will also be the benchmark on our trip and I imagine we could extend that further to include Africa.

As well as being dirty and smelly, with mould and various other things growing on the walls, it was incredibly noisy with lots of banging going on – both doors and people.  The mattress had lost what spring it might have had 30 years ago and after a bit more research we found some more reviews claiming that it is also brothel, so if you are an avid collector of fungal diseases, athlete’s foot is just one of the many you can pop into your scrapbook.

Here are some reviews for you to peruse at your leisure: http://www.dailyinfo.co.uk/reviews/venue/632/Nanford_Guest_House

Roof Tent

We’ve owned our roof tent for a while now, but as we didn’t have a roof rack until recently, it has been a rather fetching artwork taking up a great deal of space in our one bedroom flat.

Besides being quite expensive, I now also owe a couple of friends a lot of beer for initially helping carry it up to our 3rd floor flat, and then bursting several foo-foo valves carrying it back down again to install on the car a couple of months later.  (A foo-foo valve is the organ a weightlifter is trying to protect when he wears a large belt.  It is connected to various other organs in the body and when strained causes the weightlifter to release his / her bladder and in extreme cases his /her bowels.)

Having installed the tent we headed out to a camp site 20 minutes away to try it out for a weekend.  Pitching it and putting it away again was simple and painless, and at some stage I’m sure there will be a time trial.  It was quite comfortable to sleep in, and I’m really looking forward to the excitement of waking up to animals below us.

We were also the talk of the camp site and having parked in the middle of a herd of camper vans  we had more pensioners than you can shake a walking stick at coming along to have a chat about the tent.

In a campsite full of OAPs my bladder felt like it wasn’t working hard enough and pleasant dreams soon turned into nightmares about spending a penny at 2 in the morning.  With scary things like shongololos (millipedes) and spiders down below, late night bathroom breaks are an issue we will have to resolve somehow and unfortunately I don’t think there is an elegant solution.  Any ideas are welcome!

For the roof tent spotters among you it’s an Eezi-Awn.  We’ve done loads of research, and if you’re in the market for a roof tent, our advice would be to stay away from cheaper tents and stick to more established brands, even if you go for a second hand one like we did.  Hannibal and Howling Moon appear to be other really good alternatives.

First Aid Course

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Don’t feed the bears

Jules and I went on a 2 day first aid course with Wilderness Medical Training, a company specialising in training people who are travelling to remote areas where access to medical help is limited.

The last first aid course I did was a 5 day “intensive” First Aid at Work course, which predominantly involved learning how to call an ambulance, fill out an accident form, and keep your patient comfortable until the ambulance arrived in 7 minutes.

The highlight was when we were dealing with burns and a little old lady on the course (who paints faces at children’s parties for a living) put the level of tuition into perspective by using being scolded when you spill some tea on your chest as an example. Fortunately another person on the course was a retired sniper and he trumped her example with a story of watching soldiers he knew being burned alive in a tank and nobody being able to help them because of enemy fire.

Having done various first aid courses in the past, I was expecting the normal CPR, recovery position etc, but this one went way beyond that, from popping a dislocated shoulder back into place, to treating a collapsed lung.  We were also told what antibiotics we would need for things like diarrhoea.

Throughout the course we were shown examples of injuries and how to treat them.  The photo above was one of the tamer, although more memorable ones and is an example of what happens to you if you get too close to a polar bear – something we will pay careful attention to when we’re in the Sahara.  In this instance prevention is better than cure and the solution is similar to coming across a shark while diving - out swim / out run the person you are with.

 

Hi-Lift Jack

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Our jack was sent to Jules’ office but for some reason she was too lazy to bring it home on the tube so we had to drive in to pick it up.

As it was second hand, I lovingly pulled it apart, cleaned the grime and oiled the bits that needed oil and following that a miracle occurred – I managed to put it back together.

As we don’t have jacking points on the car yet, I was unable to try it out – kind of like being good enough to get a present from Father Christmas, but not quite good enough to get batteries, knowing that the shops are also closed on Boxing day.  While Jules was lying in bed reading, I jacked up the bed, but after that bollocking I was relegated to the lounge to jack up the couch.

It is an amazing piece of kit, with a load capacity of over 2 tons.  It has a number of uses, from changing tyres, to vehicle recovery and even as a jaws of life.  One thing you quickly learn is that it is not a toy and can cause serious injury if not used correctly – something I can testify to, having painfully stubbed my toe.

This link was very useful in pulling the jack apart to clean it and put it back together again.